Dreaming With Numbers.

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Welcome to Miami, where the rich act poor and the poor act rich. Where some men drop you lower than their bank accounts, yet buy the latest gadgets on bad credit.  Where some women pay full price for a boob jobs, but pull extensions on their light bills. Where men drive German cars, yet can’t afford to fix them, and some women are out shopping with money they can’t spend while looking for their next victim.

They say,  “You can tell a lot about a person by the company they keep.” Lets talk about this.

On my way to class yesterday, a song came on. I have heard this song many times, yet whenever I listen to it, I always ask, “How do I stop myself from being just a number… in a city so full of shit.” Yesterday, I was finally able to answer that question.

Depending on the company you keep, determines what place you hold. And suddenly everything started to make sense. I’m the kind of woman people call to for advice, I’m the kind of person people look for to enjoy their moments with. I’m that girl, who when one of my female friends or even male friends go out, they text me with a picture of what they are wearing, to get an opinion before heading out. I’m someone who picks up the phone at 3 am, when my people are in need, and I’m also that kind of friend who inspires others to be better.  However, sometimes as fulfilling as all that sounds, I also need some inspiration.

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About a month ago, my friend gave me a Field Notes book. It sat on my nightstand for a while before I dotted on its invisible lines. My first entry was a synopses of my trip to New York. Followed by a moment back in time, and then my third entry was a drawing of my persistence of memory. Everything around us is based on space and time, everything we do is conducted by numbers, from the moment we wake up, to the minute we fall asleep, we breath with time.

I am the kind of person who thinks too much, every second of every hour, of every day, my mind is consumed with something. I overanalyze, and that’s one of my biggest problems, not taking a moment to give reason to time. Everything I want, everything I need, along with everything I touch is caused by a number. All, because I just want to be inspired.

While some spend most of their time, surrounding themselves with people who are trying to make it. I just have to look and see that I am surrounded by people who already have. In my circle friends, I have a therapist, whose job is to make sure your child can overcome barriers that will enable them to be a part of society.  I also have a teacher, whose has taken his love for literature,  music and art, and has applied it to his curriculum for the year, bringing creative writing back into a time where people have lost the ability to express without JPEGS, lyrics, or calling themselves some wanna be title to something not so great. I have a doctor, whose life consists of saving lives. I have a musician who is so-bad-ass for his own good, and most of you are fan’s of his work.  And my best-friend is a top dog at a well known company, making boss like moves in your everyday life, and you don’t even know it. Those people I just mentioned; if ever there were a moment where I would pick up my phone and say, “I need you” they would be here in a heartbeat because through the years, they have shown me just that.  Why? Because I’m a good number in their lives, and they are a great number of people in mine. These people are the ones who make a difference in my world.

During class, the professor asked a question, but before we get to it, he had this to say.

You will come across a vast amount of people who are looking to you for answers.  Who have a billion and one problems, yet with those problems, there will be one question they are going to want to ask, but won’t. Perhaps because its too soon, or perhaps they will never ask, it will be your job to bring it out of them. Now, before you do, you’re going to have to ask yourself this question first, but during this time, use caution, for without its reason it will be hard  to venture off trying to help someone who is looking for your guidance. (hmmm, food for thought)

“How would you like to be remembered?”

Once you have formed this outlook about yourself, only then, will you fully understand those you encounter in your life.

Which brings me back to the beginning of this post, if you surround yourself with empty people, chances are that’s what you will get, zero.  So I would like to thank those who have surrounded themselves with me, because we are constantly building in each others lives, they give, I give.  We care enough about who we are as a person, that we attract great people in our lives, sometimes you will come across those who have less to offer, but its only because we didn’t apply caution to the wind. And that my friend is the key to a stable life, knowing what kind of number you are, separating yourself from the rest, allowing someone to feed you their gift, while receiving yours at the same time, without expectations.  I’m glad I was able to find these people at an early stage  in my life because BUILDING is who I am, and every day I dream with numbers.

October: the New Kind of Love.

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While my mother was in rehab, recovering from her surgery, we met a family that touched our hearts in so many ways. One Sunday afternoon, I walked in to my mother’s room, which she shared with another lady, a much older lady. I sat on the share next to my mother’s bed, hoping that God would fill me, if just for that moment with the strength not to breakdown in front of her.  My mom looked at me and said, “Waji, sometimes in life even loving from a distance is a great thing.”

At that moment, the ladies family came into the room. Her son is a quadriplegic, he was cliff diving, at 22, vacationing on his honeymoon, with his beautiful bride, and broke his spine.  They have no children, but have been together for 25 years, and you would think they had recently met, from the sign of fresh love still circling the areola of both their eyes.  Five years into their marriage, she was diagnosed with breast cancer.

“I hated myself for becoming sick, because I had to take care of him, and I felt selfish knowing that I was the one who needed the help, and attention, and I felt like it was taking time away from him. Many nights I asked him to leave me, and he told me, “If you didn’t leave me at 22, I’m not leaving you, ever. We kept each other alive. It’s what you do when you love someone, even if you know they can’t, not because they don’t want to, but because its physically impossible for them to do the things you need at the moment. But even then, if I needed to go to the bathroom, and I didn’t have the strength, he would find it somehow to place me on his lap, and take me to the bathroom.  He fought for me, even at my worst, even when I didn’t want to anymore. We fought for each other. That, my dear Waji is love.”

The lady, whose bed was next to my mother’s, was battling cancer, her husband of 55 years was by her side, and every time he looked away from her to enter a conversation, he would start off by saying, “she’s so beautiful.”

The day before she went to hospice, she looked at me and smiled, held my hand and said, “Have faith, my child.”

Today we got the news that she passed away. My thoughts are with the Lorenzo family, and my heart is with everyone who is fighting for love and life.

Sometimes people come into your life, and you don’t even have to say a word, but somehow, they will give you something from their life that you can take into yours.

Weekend Recap!

For the first time in over a year I ventured off into the city. I can’t remember the last time I did my hair, and make up, picked out a fabulous outfit, and made Miami my bitch, but this weekend was the perfect way to start.
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Friday night I made my way down to Speak. I haven’t been to an open mic spot since New York City, then again, all of the open mic spots I have stepped foot in have been in New York, but it was nice to finally experience it in my home town for once.

Now, Miami has a long way to go, but I won’t discourage those who are putting in the work to keeping words alive in a time were people connection is at an all time low. However, it was a nice change of scene, and one of the things I missed most about myself. That no matter where I go, my presence is felt, and I adapt rather comfortably to any environment. Thank you, to Skrolls and the fine people at Speak for their hospitality.

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Next stop: ArtWalk

I want to start off by saying; I have nothing but love for those I bumped into while walking down the streets of Wynwood. It was great receiving all of your hugs and warm hellos at the sign of my appearance. I know I have been in hiding for quite sometime, but I promise the hiatus will come to an end; after finales. Then I’m all yours!

After hitting most of the galleries on the strip, we stopped at the Wynwood Wall to admire the murals of both, Futura and OBEY, we worked up a hardcore appetite from all the walking, that we decided to order a table at the Wynwood Kitchen & Bar. This was the most relaxing dinner I have had in a VERY long time, and the company wasn’t bad either. I recommend this place to everyone, just keep in mind that the line for the bathroom is an hour wait.



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Te amo, Miami. See you next time.

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Thirsty for Sofia Vergara.

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I have a woman crush on Sofia Vergara. I mean c’mon, who doesn’t? The Colombian Goddess has me wrapped around her seductive lips. I just can’t get enough of her smile, she could light up any room with the way she expresses herself, how exotic she is and her personality is downright fantastic that you just can’t help but to want to wife her.  Plus it doesn’t hurt that the woman has a HOT DAMN body, Vergara is the epidemy of woman in my world!

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Monday’s Eye Candy-Ed Skrein!

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What can I say; I have a thing for the finest things in life and this guy falls nothing short of it.  From the moment he was introduced on the show, I just knew he would be my favorite character in the series, apart from the obvious, I have grown found of the Stark children, but there is just something about this man. I don’t know if its because he’s an Aries child, a British man or  if deep down inside I’m a masochist, but I wouldn’t mind being his love goddess for a night. He is absolutely delicious.


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Ed Skrein

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Ricki Hall is the New Black!


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I thought for sure my girly parts were dead, but then I came across Ricki Hall, and Hello Lady! I was back in business.  Now, its pretty obvious why I am attracted to this man. Let’s not focus on the obvious, Rather lets look at the bigger picture here. His back is flawless, his body is tight work, and his midsection makes me what to use the lords name in vain, plus those tattoos deserve my tongue all over them…but do you blame me?

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Jesus take the wheel!

Welcome Back!

I have been on a life hiatus for a minute.  You know when you’re alive, but not living? Sometimes you just need to tune out from your environment so that once you step back into the world, your eyes, your heart, your soul has an even broader perspective.  I’m a person of flora; put me outside where I can feel the warmth of the sky and you have one happy lady by your side. While most tend to be trendy in the superficialness that entices the mundane city goers of our everyday Miami scene, I was taken to a part of our city I learned most know of, but don’t dare to go due to the drive.  Now, if you’re anything like my friends and I, then you don’t mind taking a drive into something new.

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The day started off at the Wat Buddharangsi, a Buddhist temple in Homestead.  We didn’t make our way inside out of respect for their prayers, yet the outside was just as peaceful as stepping foot indoors.  Although the renovations are underway, it doesn’t take away from the harmony flowing around the temple from the moment you drive up to the minute you drive out, the energy just consumes you.  As we walked around taking pictures being cautious of our awe for this place, I found myself admiring a louts flower painted on one of the windows facing the courtyard where a fountain of dedications stood.  Every tree planted, every rock picked along with the gold trimming wrapped around the building which looked like canoes being led by phoenixes, was a pieces of serenity being inhaled.  Sometimes you need to stand in a place like this to appreciate the transformation of your own energy.

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Shortly we found our way towards the Redlands. Ever wished there was a place where you could take someone and show them with a glance, one breath, and hours’ filled with tunes that give a broad a view of what’s inside your soul? Well, I wasn’t aware of such a place until I stepped foot into the courtyard of the Schnebly Redland’s Winery.

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We started off at the bar for beer and wine tasting. I’m not a fan of beer but I was most impressed with their strawberry wine spritzer. I’m also not a big drinker so I sipped on my companies drinks for most of the afternoon, as I enjoyed the serenity around this beautiful hidden location down deep in the heart of the Redlands. It’s not just a wine and beer spot for the adults to enjoy; it’s also family oriented, so it’s safe to say, I will be making plenty of trips in the near future. Once you have your drink of choice in hand you are then welcomed by a tropical walk way into the courtyard, followed by the sounds of waterfalls into a man mad river filled with Khoi fishes, along with other creatures surrounding this place with nothing but jazz music at your ear. If that doesn’t give you an insight to my soul than I don’t know what will. I’m sure most of you are the same way, but once I step foot into an atmosphere that soothes me it allows for creativity to flow, I want to create something, give something, write something that will allow you to feel my vibe.

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They say that once you feed your mind, and your soul, you must then feed your body. Well, that’s exactly what happened when we came across a tiny little hole in the wall down in Homestead by the name of RAICES (Roots). And what we found was heaven-sent with a flavor only the island of Puerto Rican is known for.  So, if you’re ever in the mood to want to know me a little deeper,…then trace my steps back to this day, and it will show you who I truly am.

A million thank yous’ to my boy Jason for bringing me back. I now feel like my old-self again.

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I Love NY.

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I have seen New York in its darkest days.  I have seen it unite as the years go by, I have seen it reach a point where most would digress after a fall, and I have seen it rise even stronger than before. The people of New York are tougher than most, not in personality or in character, but in humanity. They are strong souls, some of the most honest and truest people you’ll ever meet, who stand together, walk among each other, and have not allowed fear to overcome them. Although we all suffered a loss in more ways than one on 9/11 as a nation, few know what it means to be part of this city. While some loathe it for its busy commuting system due to lack of knowledge, it is the human flow of the New York life, its music, its diverse culture and it’s ever changing atmosphere that makes so many including myself fall in love at every corner.

This year I had a chance to get away and visit the city which I will always and forever hold dear, and although my visit was short, it was just the right amount of New York I needed to bring me back to breathing right, and I got to thinking on my flight home, that if this place can suffer a huge fall and rise so gracefully, then I’ll be just fine.

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“The greatest accomplishment is not in never falling, but in rising again after you fall.”

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Fifty Shades of Charlie Hunnam!


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So this is the man who will play Christian Grey, in Fifty Shades of Grey…WOW!  I’m going to be extremely honest, and get it out of the way, but I did not enjoy these books one bit.

For starters, while reading the books  it dawned on me that they were a poor X-rated imitation of the Twilight Saga, which I did enjoy because I have a fascination for mythical creatures, therefor Vampires are my favorite dead-people in the world, so that’s one.  And two; come on, REALLY ladies? Half of the shit written in these books  are so basic, and seeing how crazy women were becoming over the very sloppy detail of intimacy or lack thereof, I was beginning to question…”Was there something wrong with me?”

Now, when I started the books I was involved with a man whose personality and unattainable feelings resembled those of Christian Grey.  The story of my life. So every page I read was just another reminder of a man I needed to get out of my system in more ways than one. MAN…everyone should fuck like this. His fucking tapped right into all of my issues, and I needed every single one of his fucked up issues inside me.

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Later I learned that not a lot of women have experienced sex this way, and it was a reality check that couples are sticking to the basic formality of sex (vanilla sex) and women comforted to living vicariously through them as if this was the first sex book to hit the market.  For some reason couples have lost the spice that happens in the beginning of relationships over time, while others have found that if it weren’t for these books, they wouldn’t have been able to approach their partner, and find the kinks that apply most to them. Now, I’m not going to say that spanking the shit out of a woman’s ass to the point where she can’t sit the next day is right. Fuck that side of the book. I’m talking exotic- sweaty- hungry- tie me- I can’t live without having you- and the next day I’m still feeling the motion inside of me sex, all at the thought of you. Not toxic sex, that’s just gross.

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However, I apologize for veering off topic , but let’s go back to this guy right here. The universe couldn’t have given us a better looking man to play the role of fucking Christian Grey. Allow me to express that when I read the books I gave Christian a beard, along with a personality who could fuck even your shadow if you let it.  Now, I’m not going to fake the funk, and tell you that I wont be buying a ticket to opening night, because I will be there opening night. I mean, c’mon…I want to see Charlie Hunnam split that woman in half.  Let’s face it, if you can’t get your ass spanked and hair pulled during sex every once in a while, then you’re not living.  ;)

The End.

Cause A Little Bit of Summer Makes a Lot of History.

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Most of you know how big of a fan I am of John Mayer, right? I mean, what is there not to be a fan of? The man is smart, attractive, witty, charming, kind, loving and an astounding musician. I am even going to go as far as quoting Emma Stone, from ‘Friends with Benefits’, “Its John Fucking Mayer!”

If there’s ever a moment where I start to feel doubt, I pop in one of his albums (any one of them) and by the time it’s finished I feel completely relieved. Perhaps it’s because we are so close in age that I relate to his lyrics so much, that or, because he is such an amazing composer, which allows him to have the natural ability to disbar your qualms, despite of everything he himself has gone through. Which leads me to believe that Johnny knows what he’s talking about after all.

Come Sunday I will be under the same sky, at the same place, and at the same time once more with this man whose music has played a huge role in my life in more ways than one. He was there through all the heartaches, he was there when both of my children were diagnosed with Autism, he was there when I gave birth to my last son, when my grandparents passed away, he was even there after my divorce, and without questions, he continues to be here now.

He’s like a vintage quilt passed on through time, where you patch your stories as you move forward, you see the ageing behind every stitch you have grieved, with lessons that only feel virtuous after you have surpassed them, and your history together reminds you that the heart of life is good when you’re in the presence of one another.

See you in WPB, buddy. Welcome back!